i realized that if i want something done, i should make it happen. i should act rather than wait to be acted upon.
i immediately went inside my room after that realization and i pondered. i imagined what i want to happen in my life. and i wrote down goals i want to achieve and things i want to acquire. and it occurred to me... maybe that's why i was so disappointed when i did an evaluation on my life some months ago; i didn't have a set of clear goals and list of things that i wanted to realize and complete. i was just promenading. i worked hard but since i had no clear goals, my efforts were wasted and i didn't get that far.
so there i was, patiently penning down what i call now my new "life purpose". my realization reconfirmed the importance of paradigm shifts; of rescripting my life; of creating changes for the better. the things i wrote would serve as my map as i go on with life. and i'm pretty sure i now know where to go and how to get there this time.
i woke up feeling lighter. the very moment i opened my eyes, i let out a smile and i thanked the Almighty for another chance at making things right.
my imagination was working like crazy! after some time i wasn't thinking about meeting mr. right, or experiencing carnal pleasures with god knows who!; or getting even with people that hurt me. i was so happy to even think about those. for only today i was able to totally grasp the power of imagination. it could take us to planets we never thought could exist. it could help us visualize an uncreated worlds of potential that lie deep within us. i felt like i am so ready to back in the corporate world with the new me.
so at around 2pm i found myself on the portals of the the historic basilica minor del sto. niño. remembering a friends recommendation, i bought 22 candles and uttered my petitions to Him. (a correlated tale: i'm not sure if this is true though, but that friend told me that lighting 22 candles is a jewish tradition done during hanukkah- a "festival of rebirth" and miracles.)
[okay! i didn't personally utter my petitions. i paid an old lady who was selling candle sticks near the basilica. i told her what i wanted to ask from the heavens above, paid her, and stayed by her side as she danced bringing those candles to and fro, up and down, then sideways; while she was murmuring things i assume was her prayers for me. i didn't like the thought that someone would have to do the begging for me. but what can i do? that's the tradition. and i compensated for that and i said my personal little prayer as well. but maybe that needs to be changed too.]