A couple of weeks ago during my birthday i received a lot of greetings from family, friends and absentee lovers (i'll have another post for them). Some greeted personally, some thru text messages and phone calls and more was thru Facebook.
I was feeling so special and happy until i eyed on ex's post on my wall. We had no communication after we broke up some years ago, but there it was... an unexpected greeting. I replied with a simple 'Thank you' as i did to the rest of the well wishers.
Why was there a need for him to do that? I can only assume. Maybe because we share the same circle of friends who have started asking if we had issues with each other (we're both in the closet and haven't told anyone in the circle about us being together, or how the relationship ended badly. And they surely noticed how we became cold to each other all of a sudden.) so him not greeting me might pave way to a lot more questioning. Or it could be that he really means well and wanted to make friends with me.
As for me, anger is gone, there's no more bitterness, but being friends with him would be the last thing i want on this earth! I just don't want anything from him.
However, a friend reminded me that it would be his birthday tomorrow. Now I feel obligated to send him my greetings! Should I greet him just for the sake (so friends would dismiss the thought of us having issues) or should i just be true to myself and ignore his birthday?! After all, he doesn't exist in my world anymore.
hello clandestine planet! the mkre evolved cc would advise you to just greet him as simply as he greeted you. just return gesture. but the cc who knows how it feels and who recently felt exactly the same way about his ex would tell you to just ignore the birthday. there will be a time when this will all be water undere the bridge. but not just yet. so you see, i struggle with my evolution. but for now, authenticity is more important.
ReplyDeleteyou don't have to. that's it, no explanations needed. ;-)
ReplyDeleteI suggest you return the gesture in a simple manner. For all we know, he's just being civil to you.
ReplyDeleteI'm in the same situation. Don't greet him. The fact that you're still musing over the idea shows that you are still somewhat affected. You're over thinking. The day will come when you won't care anymore, and when it does, that's when you greet him.
ReplyDeleteIf you're going to greet him just as a show for your friends, don't bother. Who keeps track of wall posts anyway?
ReplyDeletejust simply greet him 'happy birthday'; nothing more nothing less.
ReplyDeletePast is past
ReplyDeleteif both of you are still friends then why not, otherwise you don't need to please him or at least greet him on his birthday if you don't want to
Frankly, if he's not part of your world anymore then it wouldn't hurt reciprocating a simple gesture of thank you.
ReplyDeleteAfter all, we are civil people. :)
Belated Happy Birthday!
"Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much." from Oscar wilde
ReplyDeleteI vote for returning the simple greeting.
That's one nice surprise for your birthday. Be true to your self dude. If you can just tell him "Happy Birthday" just for the sake of it, then why not.
ReplyDeleteBut be prepared if this guy starts connecting with you again... hey who knows it might actually be a way for you guys to rejuvenate friendship. But if he replies with a simple "Thank you" then hey edi mas less problematic
Belated happy birthday!
arf_arf
there really is nothing wrong when he greeted you during your birthday and you reciprocating..although you feeling obliged to do it got me thinking that you shouldn't.
ReplyDeleteif he would try to establish the line of communication with you after you greeted him, then you have all the right to decline.
well i didn't have that problem because my ex though he is a friend now, didn't greet me during my birthday. heehee.
@CC Thank you.Your say on this would make up 40% of my decision. See? that's how i idolize you. *hugs*
ReplyDelete@Ian,frakmymind,drew,Ewan (team "no greeting") -Muchas Gracias mi Amigas. Some good points there.
@~Carrie~,dr magsasaka,Guyrony,Danielle Patrick (team "greet him")-Merci!You're right as well, if i will ever greet him, that would be me being civil. (or being insincere?!)
@Guyrony Love the comment. Ginamit pa talaga ang "part of your world" feeling ko tuloy ako si Ariel (hindi yung Rivera ha!). I hope hindi mo namoy ang malansa kong kaliskis while posting your comment. Thanks for the greeting! mwah!
@Danielle Patrick It was a happy birthday indeed! meow_meow...
@paci -Thank you for that. Glad to hear you were able to keep the friendship with your ex. let me greet you for him nlang para masaya... Belated Happy Birthday!
ReplyDelete