Monday, June 13, 2011

Random Thoughts

-i know i need to sleep for tonight's shift. if i won't get at least 2 hours of sleep now (2:01 pm my time), i'll have have a looonnggg night at the office for sure. it's gonna be hard keeping your eyes open when your mind's not working... when your eyelids are closing how do you keep it up? when your back hurts and you want to lay down and rest it how do you convince yourself you're awake and alert?

-i'm quitting work soon so i have to save up. i need to have enough dough to blow while i process my papers for my Canadian dream. Payday's coming and salary according to my mental calculation will just be enough to last me until the next paycheck. How am I gonna survive? How, how, how? (de carabao?)

-letting go... it's hard. (at least this time it's not on love. for a change!). i'm letting go of my current job to pursue another path which will hopefully give me a better future. it's another risk i'm taking to get yet another chance of fulfilling what i have always wanted to have and where i have always wanted to be. to see what's out THERE! to be THERE!

-one more year's come and gone and nothing's change at all. so i need to do this. i need to sacrifice a little... just a little... if i fall a little, i'll stand up again. if i'll fail a little, i'm gonna dream a little more... if i'll cry a little, i'm gonna smile a little more once the tears are gone. whatever's the outcome of this, at least i can say i tried. and being able to say so is gonna be a big relief- not just a little- HUGE!

-i wanna go to the beach. i'll find time to spend a quite night in the shores one of these days. alone.. with the moonlight reflecting on the calm waters and the cold, salty air touching my face... some quite time to ponder on some deep and personal things and not having to worry about work stuff or the future... sitting on the sand while listening to the sound of the waves breaking on the shore... just thinking of the "here and now". ahhhhhh!!!! what a bliss it would be!

-i wanna... i wanna... sleep! so i'll end this now and have a lie-down.

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